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Stink
Yes, you
Oooh! Cool
Lol
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A cloud weighs around a million tonnes. A cloud typically has a volume of around 1km3 and a density of around 1.003kg per m3 – that's a density that’s around 0.4 per cent lower than the air surrounding it (this is how they are able to float).
What’s red and moves up and down? A tomato in an elevator.
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Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent!
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What kind of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly-squats.
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What did Dory order from McDonald’s? The Big MacKerel!
Big mackerel
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What do you call a wrestler who always comes in second place? The Penultimate Warrior!
🙄
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What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.
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Where does a spy go to the toilet? A gents!
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What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
mhm
funk
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How do you know when the moon has had enough to eat? When it’s full.
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I WILL
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Why couldn’t Captain America find Thor’s brother? He was Low-key!
What do you call a rooster staring at a pile of lettuce? A chicken sees a salad.
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When should you take a plum to dinner? If you can’t find a date!
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Why did the manager bring a pencil and paper to the match? They were hoping for a draw!
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How does a penguin build his house? Igloos it together.
Haha funny
Lol
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What runs but never goes anywhere? A refrigerator.
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Why did the restaurant hire a pig? He was good at bacon.
Lol
What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A Maybe.
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What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable.
Hmmm cool
Lol
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a
How do you make a water bed bouncier? Add spring water.
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Novo and Roll are on a roll
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FUNKY
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Where do pirates get their hooks? Secondhand stores.
as
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A big moron and a little moron were standing on a cliff. The big moron fell off. Do you know why the other one didn’t? Because he was a little more on.
Haha man
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Why did the clown always choose the red balloon? Because they were pop-ular.
66
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Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? There was de-Brie everywhere.
Woahaha
Which month do trees dislike? Sep-timber!
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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff.
bug
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What do you call birds that stick together? Vel-crows.
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What did the tomato say to the other tomato during a race? Ketchu
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How did the barber win the race? He knew a shortcut.
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What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.
What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
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How do rabbits travel? By hareplanes.
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What did the yoga instructor say when her landlord tried to evict her? Namaste.
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When do computers overheat? When they need to vent.
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What are a shark’s two most favorite words? Man overboard!
@Roll Im Gonna mute you now. My push notifications are on fireee. I'll unmute you after this ends.
Likewise
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Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice!
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What kind of ghost has the best hearing? The eeries
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What do you call a singing laptop? A Dell!
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Why did the M&M go to school? He wanted to be a Smartie.
Noo way lol
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You know what I saw today? Everything I looked at.
Ah no
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What do skateboarders do when they’re really talented? They GoPro!
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Why did the alien go to the doctor? He was looking a little green.
Hmmm dad joke
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What do you call ticks in space? Luna-ticks.
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What do planets sing in a choir? Nep-tunes.
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What did Venus say to Saturn? Give me a ring.
Not a good one
What kind of doctor fixes broken websites? A URLologist.
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What do Martians like to drink? Gravi-TEA.
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What is an astronaut’s favorite meal of the day? Launch.
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What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purrr-ple.
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yep
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Why couldn’t the pony sing? Because she was a little hoarse.
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Where do cows go for entertainment? The mooooo-vies!
No.you
Why did the tree go to the dentist? It needed a root canal.
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If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do elves get? Mistle-toes.
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
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What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates.
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Why are teddy bears never hungry? Because they’re always stuffed!
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Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
Y3ah