What's up with people and "work"?!
Each- and every day, I get asked what im planning to do in regards to work, and honestly? I. Don't. Know. And I'm starting to dread the upcoming family gathering more each day it's getting closer.
At the age of almost twenty five, I still have no clue about what i'm going to spend the next decades on in pursuit of earning a salary; I don't even know if I want the former to be my future in the first place! Yet people try to push me down the threaded path they too stumbled along, failing to see that it just may happen to not be the path I want to take; but what do I want?
A house? A happy family and loving wife? And even if, what's the price for that? (Not speaking in monetary terms).
See, i'm a big fan of introspection: simply wandering around the fields and woods, and thinking out loud about what went well- and not-so-well in the current week or month. I think about differing topics and positives and negatives, but the clear leader of those walks is the topic i'm rambling on about right now, namely: work and my general future.
Through that, I've found that it's not that I don't want to work per se, it's that the "want" turns into "have" sooner or later, and that's what breaks my neck every damn time. As soon as the sensation of having to get up, having to get to work and having to do said work gets me, it's a steady decline towards quitting.
Well Fabs, how does that feel like? Well...
- Imagine someone whose trying to push two identical poles (+ on +, or - on -) of two very strong magnets together.
That's how it feels, and there's gonna be a time where you simply don't have the energy to continue pushing any longer.
The above is not only true for work: as soon as I feel like having to do something for extended periods of time, I almost always quit.
I think that that's my biggest personal weakness: I fail to persevere in most cases, and I don't know how to change it.
Well Fabs, what's the fix? Good question, next please! 'Cause I don't know either.
I've been thinking about simply grabbing my bag and winging it, but I don't see that being a good life either.
I've started a course in the healthcare industry, and I'm applying for an apprenticeship right now in hopes of finally finding something I can make my peace with, but what if this fails too?
I'm slowly starting to get at end of my wits...