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youhouu
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Ca-shew!
youhouu
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Phillipe Phillope.
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youhouu
What do you call a dog that’s been run over by a steamroller? Spot!
youhouu
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror? Haloumi!
youhouu
Why did the developer go broke? Because he used up all his cache.
youhouu
How does Lady Gaga like her steak? (sing) Raw-raw-raw-ra-ah-aww
Why did the woman go on the date with the mushroom? Because he was a fun-ghi.
youhouu
Why is it impossible to starve in the desert? Because of all the sand which is there!
youhouu
Why can’t Chuck Norris use the internet? Because he won’t submit.
youhouu
Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella? Fo drizzle.
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youhouu
What do you give to a sick lemon? Lemon aid
youhouu
What don’t ants get sick? They have anty-bodies.
youhouu
What type of candy is always late? A chocolate.
youhouu
Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrgh!
Why did the ghost go to rehab? He was addicted to boos.
youhouu
What do you call a dinosaur with only one eye? A Do-you-think-he-saw-us!
youhouu
What do you call sad coffee? Despresso.
youhouu
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
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The past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
youhouu
Which table fits in the fridge? VegeTABLE.
youhouu
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
youhouu
What do you call someone who can’t stick with a diet? A desserter.
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