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Cell phone addiction is the new problem of this era. Did it begin with the advent of social media or was it just the one that ended up sentencing it?
I was out for a walk with my family and I couldn't help but notice how there were other families, groups of friends and couples on the same trip plan, but with their eyes immersed in their phones. In this place there is a boat ride in a small artificial lagoon. There was a couple "enjoying" this activity but with their faces in their cell phones. I really didn't understand how they could be more attentive on their phones than pedaling the boat. This same case happens a lot in restaurants. People no longer talk to each other, it's more important to watch memes or videos.
Here I am writing about this, condemning this addiction while my gaze is fixed on my cell phone and your gaze is on reading these words, what are we doing?
Do you ever spend hours on your phone, tablet or computer and not realize how much time you've spent concentrating on it? Don't you feel like life is going by faster?
Yesterday I was listening to a podcast about this, about how we feel that the week goes by much faster because we are distracted. We wake up and the first thing we do is grab our phone, we are on public transport and our face is in the phone... because you have gone to the bathroom with your phone, right?
There are reasons why smartphones are hard to put down. The sounds and vibrations catch our attention, and the games, notifications, social media, and messages provide instant gratification. Smartphones offer a constant source of entertainment and distraction. Companies use persuasive design techniques with features like infinite scrolling, push notifications, and personalized content to keep us engaged and make it harder to disconnect.
This culture of speed has made you stop enjoying even the things that ARE MADE FOR ENJOYMENT, going for a walk, visiting your loved ones, going out with friends, people go to the movies and are on their cell phones, something that surprised me was being in a movie theater and seeing a child watching videos on YouTube with his tablet, this no longer makes any sense, something typical is also seeing children at birthday parties and parks with their tablets. A phenomenon that occurs frequently in this last decade is that of parents disassociating themselves from the responsibilities they have with their children when it comes to setting limits, an example is: a 1 or 2 year old child throwing a tantrum (something normal at that age) or crying for anything you can imagine, the automatic solution to calm them down is "put the tablet down, watch videos and stop crying", then you see how the children stop crying in less than a second and are mesmerized by the screens. Another scenario that I see daily is that they give their children the tablet or phone to watch videos while mom or dad feeds them just to keep them from moving, THEY ARE CHILDREN, THAT'S WHAT THEY DO, MOVE!!. I agree with taking advantage of technology, but excesses are not appropriate. I'm not saying that you should never let your children watch videos on a cell phone from time to time. There are times when it can be really useful, but doing it on a daily basis does not bring any benefit. A few days ago I asked my husband if the people who invented tablets did so with the purpose of targeting adults with children as their ideal customers. The tablet ads I see now are geared towards getting you to buy them for your children and I have even seen "tablets for kids" with bright colors and drawings.
Obviously I have also sinned by feeling addicted to my cell phone, it is an unpleasant sensation, I remember one time I had to get the screen fixed because it was broken, the technician spent about 3 days with my phone because he couldn't get the replacement part, I felt like I was desperate to get my phone back immediately, it's ridiculous, it's just a phone, at that time I wasn't even using it for work, which makes the situation even more ridiculous. Another experience that I looked back on was one time when I went to a Disney show with my daughter and I think I actually spent more time focused on recording the show and my daughter's reactions than enjoying the moment, so much so that when the show ended, I thought "I hardly watched anything." I told myself that I wouldn't do that again, that I was going to live in the moment. Yes, I like taking photos and making videos to treasure memories, but once again, excess ruins the genuine experience of your emotions. Before, on a family outing I could take hundreds and hundreds of photos, now I only take a couple of photos and I'm fine with that. Even sometimes when I go out for a walk with my husband and daughter I prefer to leave the phone at home, I don't want anything to distract me from them. I haven't given up my cell phone completely, I need it for work, but sometimes I use it excessively and I'm working on it with small steps like the ones I already mentioned, sometimes I feel guilty for using it for so long and I think I'm missing out on more important things by watching series or movies.
What I'm getting at with all of this is that if you've noticed that you spend a lot of time on your cell phone, I invite you to look up for a moment, observe your surroundings, look your loved ones in the eyes when they talk to you, really listen to what they say and don't just nod your head without taking your eyes off your cell phone, go for a walk, walk your dog without taking your phone with you, when you go to a meeting leave your phone in your pocket, the same applies when you go to a restaurant.
16 sats \ 1 reply \ @freetx 21 Nov
I was born in the early 70s....at a time when everyone smoked and generally drank too much. We would ride in cars and people would smoke with the windows rolled up.....we rode in the back of flat bed pickup trucks....it was at a time where "working out" was alien and foreign concept.
The odd thing is we never perceived any of those things as being especially "dangerous", it was just how it was.
I was talking to my sister about this recently and I remarked that probably in 30 years our kids will be saying "....you can't believe it, our parents used to give use cell phones when we were 5 years old and let us stare at them for hours!"
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I have no doubt that this is a phrase that they can say. How can you see it as something bad if your caregivers do it and are happy with it? I think that is why we do not notice it when we are children, that includes emotional abuse and spanking to make them "behave." When we are children our parents are heroes and even if they do something wrong we do not realize it until we are adults and have more knowledge about things, for children today being in front of a screen for hours is the "coolest" thing that exists.
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What you mention is totally valid, but consider that it is visible from several points of view, because you don't consider that spending two hours on SN or spending the same amount of time on FB, IG or TT has the same effect. This is obviously talking about adults. On the other hand, there is the issue of children, where I totally agree with you, it is something out of control and it is generating dependent and weak children. I consider that the best thing we can do is observe the masses, see how they act to do absolutely the opposite.
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I consider that the best thing we can do is observe the masses, see how they act to do absolutely the opposite.
I think this sentiment, if taken literally is a tiny bit oversimplified, but it's probably the correct approach most of the time! I find it a great starting point at least to guiding my behavior.
Maybe Mark Twain's adage is more subtle, that if you find yourself in the side of the majority it's best to "stop and reflect."
I wonder what the hell is going on that makes this so true? Are humans just hardwired to do the dumbest shit possible as a group? I've heard people say that individuals are usually smart but collectively we're dumb.
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I've also read about this, maybe because solitude allows you to reflect? to meditate on things? Now think about who you're surrounding yourself with, that could be a starting point.
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I've heard people say that individuals are usually smart, but collectively we are stupid
It seems complicated, since as a group we should be stronger and more awake, but it seems to apply only to minorities.
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Obviously there is a big difference in the content you consume, some will be beneficial and others will not, the point of it all is the excess with which you use your cell phone or computers to the point that when you do not do it it creates withdrawal or you simply cannot spend even 10 minutes without the phone in your hand, put down one phone to grab another or turn on the TV, the computer, anything that distracts you from the real world.
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I understand, it is true that many people fall into that state... I think that we should seek balance, that is. today every day, the use of these devices is a good necessity, so I think that something beneficial would be to choose to do outdoor activities, or not use the phone during work days (if you work with your hands in the real world), create hours of the day to not use the phone and maybe meditate, read, exercise or play some game.
As a special anecdote, I just read this text and it reminds me that yesterday when I was walking with my daughter to soccer practice, and we passed a street where there was a house under construction, and there were about 8 bricklayers working on the construction and at least three of them had the phone in their hand... 📲 🫱
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5 sats \ 3 replies \ @OT 21 Nov
We let the kids watch about an hour of TV in the evening. I can see its going to become a problem for us later on.
As long as we're conscious that we're spending so much time on our phone we can choose to do something else. Also meeting friends IRL fixes this.
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Accepting that something is not going well is the first step to making a positive change. Exactly, sharing with good friends (who are not glued to their phones), doing activities at home or outdoors are good options. This addiction to screens was undoubtedly born with televisions, when I was a child there were no tablets, but I did spend hours watching television every day.
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0 sats \ 1 reply \ @OT 21 Nov
This is the balance we've come to with the kids. We get to play on our phones while the kids watch TV. They're watching educational content and they definitely learn some things.
One difference between the TV and tablet is that you can't instantly scroll so their attention span isn't getting shorter and shorter like on a tablet.
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Oh, sorry, I didn't understand the first comment. I think that's perfect, that's the idea, to find the balance and get the best out of this, as you do with educational, fun content and with a reasonable amount of time. Point for the TV, the fact that they don't have to slide the screen forces them to pay attention, they put on programs from TV channels or from some streaming platform.
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5 sats \ 1 reply \ @drlh 21 Nov
My screen time is 2 hours on phone, in weekend it's less than an hour and 8 hours on laptop per day for now. Before getting laptop it was much more, was reading from 5.2 inch phone "loaned" books. I am proud of finishing the Atlas shrugged, Sovereign individual, When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, the demon haunted world by Carl Sagan, Road to Serfdom, uncommunist manifesto and 1984 with that screen. Would like to finish the constitution of liberty though.
I despise notifications so much I keep them silent always. It fills me with rage when it tries to catch my attention in random time, feeling like it tries to hook me into a sort of a slot machine, a skinner box made to doomscrool to increase engaging to watch more ads. I only keep calls with sound. Maybe that's why the only "social network" I have are the messengers, youtube and stacker news.
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Of course, you can do wonderful things with your phone, read good books, make money, connect with people you love but who live far away. I'm happy for you and because you make healthy use of screens and, better yet, you take advantage of them.
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You should try shifting your phone to grayscale to reduce the dopamine hit you get from checking your phone. You can do it in the iPhone accessibility settings, not sure about other devices
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What a great tip, thanks. I have Android and I think it has a similar option.
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My screen time is usually 8 hours (every devices combined). But in Weekends it goes to 14-16 hours, just double. I'm giving all my efforts but they go all in vain when some notification hits and I don't remember that I've already spended 15 minutes just scrolling some crap.
Yesterday I was listening to a podcast about this, about how we feel that the week goes by much faster because we are distracted.
This is absolutely correct.
I'm still not giving up I'll try my best.
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I understand what you're saying. Do you ever have 5 minutes without your phone and you immediately check it wanting to have a notification from any app? Like a desire that you can't control? I suggest you start with small steps.
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Correct. It feels like I need to look up for some messages, emails, important updates and more.
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Yes, I have had those impulses. Years ago when we used blackberries, I had one that every time a notification came in, a little red light in the corner would turn on and blink. I remember that I was always checking to see if that light was on. If I was watching a movie, I would constantly look at my phone to see if that light was on. To start a change that will benefit you, you must recognize the moments in which you are using your cell phone or phone out of boredom or anxiety and not because it is really necessary. When you detect that, you should do something else, something simple, to start with.
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Thanks for the advice. Really appreciate it
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try to go without your phone in your pocket for 5 more minutes than the day before.
i carry my kindle around everywhere but only have my phone in my pocket for at most 4 hrs. it was 8hrs this time last year
It's sad but it's reality. Don't worry about what others are missing. You do you. (I'm using my PC to read this, rarely use my phone for internet)
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Of course, everyone is responsible for their actions, but I can't help but make these observations. It's great that you have your screen time under control. What suggestions can you give to people who want to make changes in their lives regarding excessive phone use?
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Just put the phone down, It's really that simple.
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Yes and no, not everyone has the same willpower as others, it's like cigarettes, the most obvious option would be "just stop buying cigarettes" or "just don't smoke." Cell phone addiction is not "diagnosed" by the DSM 5 but it is certainly a reality and also presents withdrawal symptoms in some people more than others.
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21 sats \ 2 replies \ @bren 22 Nov
Most people are living in a dream state.
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"Thinking" other people's thoughts
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21 sats \ 0 replies \ @bren 22 Nov
I haven't thought it about it like that, thanks for that.
That reminds me of a quote I like that sort of blends with your theme. "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."
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it is a shame that the ipod was discontinued. many times i just want a nice mp3 player not my phone out and about
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I have been saying for a few years that as society starts to realize how destructive smartphones have been to our minds, there will be a resurgence / renaissance of "single use devices" and even print media and paper.
A music player that just plays music, a camera that's just a camera, newsletters that are printed out and actually come to your house.
I'm probably wrong and it's just wishful thinking, but watch for this stuff become "cool" at some point. It will be seen as way to differentiate yourself and be unique, that's when it may catch on.
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You hit the nail on the head, just as fashion trends go by, so will this one. I recently saw a video of a guy who was interviewing people on the street and one of those people was a girl of about 18 years old and she was showing off her mp4 and saying that she really liked it and its "vintage" and "aesthetic" style, she also mentioned that she bought her some "old" headphones (meaning wired) to match her mp4.
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Yes, that time of using mp3 or mp4, the best. Did you ever use Discman?
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yeah and used minidisc as well. my favorite mp3 player was actually the zune
I am this kinds of user too although it's seems very bad. 😅😔
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I also confess that I am guilty, but I want to change. Don't give up
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Yep 👍✨✨
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It cannot be denied, because now it is everyone's obligation to always use a cell phone, I also feel annoyed, my child now uses his cell phone very often, almost always playing games, if I forbid him, my child cries.
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Remember that you are the adult, you have control. How old is your child? It is normal for him to cry, all small children cry if you take away their cell phone, but sometimes you have to be "the bad guys" it is for his own good, he cannot spend all the time he wants with the cell phone, there are limits to follow and it is for his well-being, it will not hurt him to cry for a couple of minutes, give him other options for activities such as painting or playing his favorite game
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0 sats \ 2 replies \ @alt 22 Nov
This speaks to me. I realised I am suffering from phone addiction some months ago. Now that I'm aware of it, I see how it's a daily struggle, and I see so many more people suffering with the same.
I picked up a dumb phone and now I only take my smartphone out when I actually need it. It also has no SIM card so I can't access the internet without WiFi.
I think my partner is suffering from the same and I am trying to wean her off it too. The problem is short form content. We both find it so easy to open up YouTube shorts and scroll for hours, and afterwards I ask myself, was any of that content actually useful or entertaining? Mostly it seems to just be a distraction, even the funny clips and memes aren't that funny.
Some days I genuinely feel like I hate my smartphone for the effect it has on me. I can't bring myself to throw it away though because so much of my digital life is on here.
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You couldn't have said it better, you just described the situation of many. That's right, that's what those short formats were designed for, so that you get distracted easily, and spend more time hooked on seeing things that don't interest you, even now the algorithm is based on showing you content about things that bother you to generate frustration and annoyance and you get hooked on making comments arguing. You already took 2 first steps, 1 realizing that there is a problem and 2 taking action by switching to a basic phone. I'm happy for you.
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0 sats \ 0 replies \ @alt 22 Nov
Thank you. I'm trying to set an example for others in my life.
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I am also trying to use my less as it has ruined my relationship with my family.
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I'm sorry to read that, I hope you solve it soon, sometimes it is difficult, I know you can do it
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