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40 sats \ 4 replies \ @kepford OP 15h \ parent \ on: Letter to a Young Person Worrying About AI AI
This is good advice and rare advice these days. Our culture has patronized us for decades. Being a GenX guy I saw the rise of the participation trophy as well as the "everyone has to go to college" thing.
The sooner young people realize that the world isn't fair the better. You can better yourself but you need to be aware of what the world around you values and needs to succeed. Its on you. No one else. No one is going to save you. But at the same time community matters and don't be a lone ranger. Just don't be naive. People that fill your head with fairness and attempt to sell you on them fixing your problems are the worst sort of people to be around.
I've banned my kids from saying "that's not fair". It's one of the phrases that I'll respond to the most harshly. I often say, "Are you sure you want what's fair?"
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When I was five years old my mom asked me to do all of our laundry this time and I told her it wasn’t fair. “Oh you want fairness?” Since that day and until I left the house I was responsible for 100% of my laundry. I don’t remember being bothered much by it at the time but as I age I have really grown to appreciate my moms, and now my relationship with the word fairness. She instilled independence in me to a degree that I have recently come to realize is rare. She is still the greatest example of no one owes you anything and your life is the sum of your own decisions that I know.
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Yeah, I did the same with my sons. They never say it.
The word fair is really just "not what I want". The word itself repulses me. I want grace actually. Not fairness. And saying that is actually humbling.
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I think I taught my son well, yesterday he was getting into a mood and complaining "it's not fair", and I reminded him "do you really want what's fair?", he snapped out of his mood, grinned, and said, "I only want what's fair to my advantage"
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