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This is Beautiful. I spent Thanksgiving with some new "friends". I didn't really want to go and didn't too much enjoy myself overall. It was however a learning experience as always. The older I get, the more I feel like holidays are a scam. I want to be grateful every single day. I don't need to overeat on oversalted food to feel grateful. Every day is special and worth celebrating. And I want to celebrate by taking better care of myself. I don't think I want to be a part of any more thanksgiving gatherings. Thank you for sharing this. I really enjoy your writing and look forward to hearing more from you. 💚
11 sats \ 4 replies \ @ek 3 Dec
do you want to share why you didn't enjoy it?
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That's a good question. It was really just fine. The people were really kind, we shared a bunch of food and conversation. I just felt very out of place. I didn't feel like I could relate at all. The friends are a couple of other off grid living folks. And while it seems like that would give us things I common, it really feel that way for me. But there was really nothing bad happening. I have been going through some really big changes in my life for many years now. Changes that have pulled me away from my old family and friends. Changes that have really isolated me all together. And I think I have a lot of work to do to open back up to people and realize I can connect without feeling seen. I am glad you asked this question because it helps me consider the fact that it was a perfectly good day. I just feel very strange around other people. And that is something for me to look at. No one is ever going to resonate with me fully so I think if I want community back in my life, I have some work to do on opening back up. Thanks for asking.
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11 sats \ 1 reply \ @ek 3 Dec
This sounds very familiar. I asked because I wanted to confirm my guess :)
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That's good to hear. It feels really good to relate in any kind of way. And I want to appreciate it where I can find it. And maybe learn to be more adaptable.
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connect without feeling seen
That is a hard lesson for sure, I struggle there, too, but it is possible. Especially when you think of humanity as one, one big connection
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thanks much Dave!
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