Sick of the New York Times crossword puzzle or maybe just the NYT in general? I would like to present the first (correct me if I'm wrong) SN crossword puzzle, featuring the world's smallest UTXO as a reward.

If you can solve this crossword, and then interpret the results through the puzzle at the bottom, you'll have the seed phrase to the last sats from my Phoenix wallet (moved to a new wallet). There is one 500 sat UTXO in there. The first person to prove that they have access to that wallet by broadcasting a transaction or some other on-chain signing get* the 1000 sat bounty. All this to say, you really don't get anything, but it should be really fun if you like crosswords/puzzles. At the least, this should be more fun/ethical/zappy than doing the NYT games.

Across

1 - What you’d like to do to the fiat system 7 - Resident of Australia 8 - Sly signal 9 - A tender cut, this one will be hard for Brits 9.5 - Too violent for me, rated M 11 - A title of increased controversy 13 - Don’t do this with the seed phrase if you beat the crossword 14 - You did this to your draft card 15 - My ear likes to hear one, my ear also has one 15.5 - GOAT but better 16 - heart of the castle 18 - part of both the S&P 500 and military industrial complex 20 - result of impact 22 - The ibis and the wolverine both work for one of these 23 - product of destructive distillation 24 - one of twenty-four, and it’s not a word in your seed phrase 25 - out to sea! 26 - many PSAs about this in the 90s 29 - as the fed is to debasement, these folks can be to research 30 - southern “delicacy”

Down

1 - one of 43’s nicknames inverted and spelled out 2 - what I can’t do with fools 3 - don’t confuse us with ice-picks 4 - the food, not the number 5 - hippies might hug me 6 - what brings us all together on stacker news 7 - the name who told me tinnitus was permanent 10 - an mp3 of this should play for every zap 11 - another name for motorcycle 12 - what the IRS does to my taxes when I try to pay in bitcoin 13.5 - silent sound 14 - the only thing my mouth and shoe share in common 15 - if you say this verb slowly enough, it sounds like something you might say while admiring a Picasso 17 - Bitcoiners are sometimes into a philosophy that refers to these as turnings 19 - synonym of 15 down but much more dramatic 21 - world’s most popular epitaph 27 - get out of the way! 28 - the toy that taught me my first physics lessons

you can figure out the seed phrase and order if you: do (4) what (4) the (6) knights (4) think (7) crazy (6) ensigns (6, e-k) risk (6) for (7) every (6, e-e) righteous (3) scholar (6) .

You don't get the bounty for just solving the puzzles. You'll need to somehow prove access to the wallet. There are red herrings.

*I paid over 600 sats in fees to get it in there so you'll probably need to make a one sat transaction, idk, if you can solve these puzzles, you're probably smart enough to sign something from that wallet cheeply/freely