Make them your friends. Explain your point of view. Allow them to have theirs. Treat them like adults and they will respect and love you for it.
When my kids were very young, I was talking to an older father and saying: "how do you know when your kid is old enough to do thing X Y or Z" and he said "when they're old enough to successfully argue the case for it"
I took that advice and its served me well. When your 6 yo ask you to ride his bike to a friends house (in which he needs to cross a busy street) you can tell him "No its not safe". However, as he grows he may come back at 8 and say "Dad, I can ride my bike to Jimmys because I will cross at Elm street where there is crosswalk and light, and I promise to look both ways before I cross..."
Now your kid is old enough to do it and you should let him. Because he has demonstrated that (a) he understands your concerns, and (b) he has formulated a plan to accomplish what he wants to do while taking your concerns into account. This is ultimately what you want in a young person so it should be rewarded.
Makes sense. Kids are smarter than we give them credit for. I always do my best to be trusting, even when my parental extinct is to protect. My son recently started riding dirt bikes. It has been a lot of work for me on trust him not to hurt himself. And he has been doing great.
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My kid broke his arm when he was younger. Was it from riding dirt bikes? Rock climbing? Trampoline? nope. Playing tennis. Slipped on wet spot on court and fell down.
My point is, if something bad is going to happen, it can happen no matter what.
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That's a really good point. I think it is interesting that there are things that we fear so much but yet we will all drive a car which is inherently quite dangerous. All we can do is be as mindful as possible. We can't control much.
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