Therapy and trying to be a good son. Not great. But good. People are flawed. Everyone is flawed. Gotta check yourself before you check others.

Very cool of you to be aware and consciously break the cycle of harm-inducing actions 

Also great of you not to harbour any resentment against your dad

cryotosensei

No. I listen and reason with my kids. No yelling or spanking nonsense. We talk and work on solutions. My dad was a bit of a tyrant and I'm not continuing what he did. I understand that he had a lot on his plate and didn't have the bandwidth to negotiate. I don't hate him for what he did because in life we do the best we can with the tools we are presented.