I totally agree with your point of view. What is really important is the secret. Obviously, as you mention, we cannot be the owners of the number that keeps our SATS. But we are the owners and responsible for keeping that secret that leads to our SATS. 
Here I consider that cryptography is magic. And I understand why it is a fundamental piece of bitcoin when it comes to considering it as a vehicle to store and hoard our energy burned after work.

flat24

You do understand, judging by your comments. The other  dude does not.

Ok, help me understand! I am open to learning about what I don't know and reading other perspectives on the matter.

You have no idea what you are talking about

SwapMarket

alter_native

Is there an alternative or is Bitcoin really the Authentic Private Property ⁉️🤔

You have no way to prove that a number is known to you exclusively. If someone gained access to "your" key and spends the coins, the Bitcoin network won't recognise your ownership, the best you can hope for is that the legal system considers you the owner.