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I would be interested to know which conference you went to. In my case it was more like show-casing a new application or new protocol. Sometimes it was really bad, like someone clearly interested in Ethereum which tries to port what he does to Bitcoin. Most of the time though, show-casing were ok, sometimes fun.
I have to admit though I didn't socialize or went to the parties as I have zero interest in this (just interested in Bitcoin), so can't talk about it.
And the stands in my case were good, plus zero people waiting for it.
I would agree though that for learning, rather than conferences, the book published by O'Reilly by Antonopoulos has been far more effective for me. Other books, articles or podcasts as well. So I totally agree that to learn about Bitcoin, it is better to do it alone. However to see what is happening with Bitcoin, some practical feeling about it, to try the Lightning network in the real world, to see what people interested in Bitcoin actually are, I think conferences are good. For the rest, I think meetups are a better way to learn new things.
Post scriptum : never been to American or European events so maybe this is the reason for my different experience.