In a previous life, I chaperoned 30+ students on their study trip to the Beijing Language and Culture University. I painstakingly prepared some notes for them to navigate the cultural norms.
Erm, decluttering my notes but not before I park them here first. Thanks for reading:
Face-to-face communication
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If you want someone to come to you, don’t wave them over with an upturned finger. This is impolite. Wave them over with your fingers turned down, as if they were sweeping something toward you. The same motion is used when hailing a cab.
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Let the Chinese take the lead in gestures of affection. Males should be cautious about touching Chinese women professionals or guides, even in a friendly way. A handshake is perfectly appropriate and acceptable.
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Don’t use 小姐 (xiao jie) to address waitresses. Call them 服务员 (fu wu yuan) instead. 小姐 is used to refer to prostitutes in China.
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The concept of 面子 (face) is very important in China. Do not be overly aggressive with your requests as this will put your hosts in an awkward position and embarrass them. The Chinese like to answer a question in an indirect way, so even when you hear people say "We will consider it" instead of "No," it is likely that they are not able to fulfill your request. Do not push the point further.
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Likewise, don’t lose your temper. You can be firm as long as you remain polite, but to lose one’s temper is an absolute loss of face.
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When someone gives you a business card, do not stick it in your hip pocket. Also, don’t stick it in your wallet and then put your wallet in your hip pocket. You would be symbolically stating that you want to sit on them! Putting a business card in your wallet and then placing the wallet in a front pocket is no problem.
Table manners
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It is taboo to cut a pear among friends and relatives, as the words for “cutting pear” in Chinese have the same sound as being separated.
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One must never let a pair of chopsticks stand in a bowl of rice, since such action looks just like standing incense sticks up in sand, which is done only as an offering to a dead person.
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Finishing everything on your plate is NOT a good thing in China. If you eat all of your meal, the Chinese will assume you did not receive enough food and are still hungry.
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Alcohol is a big part of eating in Beijing. Especially when dining with Chinese hosts, you can expect the beer to flow freely and many beis to be gan-ed. ("Gan Bei" literally means "dry [the] glass"). As it is perfectly acceptable to use Coke or tea as an alcohol substitute, drink beer in moderation and within your limits. Obviously, the teacher advisors do not expect those who have not reached the legal age of 18 yet to drink beer merrily at the tables.
Gift-giving
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If someone gives you a present, it’s best not to open it in front of them.
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The Chinese have a prohibition against giving clocks as gifts because the word "clock" in Mandarin has a similar sound to "death”.
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To many Chinese people, a fan is a forbidden present because it sounds identical to "separation." If a person gives a fan to a friend, it is believed their friendship will stop or diminish. Therefore, it has become a phonologically linked taboo to give friends a fan in Chinese society.
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When you're just getting to know someone, and it begins to rain but they don’t have an umbrella, it’s bad luck to give them one to go home with — it’s a sure omen that you’ll never see each other again. (The Chinese word for "umbrella" sounds similar to the word for "to break apart.")
yes i was such a poser back then