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I was talking to a friend recently about the regret they have about their college major having transitioned to an indirectly related career. In general, I like to think of mistakes as accessories to success, modifiers or detours providing complementary skills or experience, even when they are traumatic in isolation. Mistakes are often what make us singular because the things we categorize as success are commonly pursued. Still, we all have regrets.
Along the line of my friend, one of mine is not taking programming courses in high school even though their teacher sought me out to join one.1 It wasn’t until 5 years later that I realized my interest on my own. Another, was when my first app got the attention of a Silicon Valley founder and I just ghosted him not realizing success is much harder to achieve alone. I’m not sure I’d wish to change time for fear of what else it might change, but in isolation, those were mistakes.
What’s one decision you might change if you could?

Footnotes

  1. He got me suspended a year earlier for a violent cartoon I drew in MSPaint. I didn’t trust him or at least I didn’t want his “help.” In retrospect, he was consistently a good guy even if he was simple.
1728 sats \ 8 replies \ @DEADBEEF 18 Aug
The biggest regret of my life is buying my current home almost 10 years ago. If I could do it all over again I would stay the heck away from this hellhole. It has been 10 years of everyday regret. The torture of waking up and seeing my mistake around me every day and then coming home from work everyday to my mistake is hell.
There are so many issues that were hidden from me and I’ve had to sink so much money into this place that I’m trapped here for the foreseeable future - especially with interest rates and the market being what it is right now. Every time I start to save up money for a down payment to get a new place some major disaster happens with this house that wipes everything out: fence collapsed in a storm, trees were rotting and needed to be removed, furnace died in the dead of winter, water softener died and flooded the basement, the hot water heater died, washing machine and dryer died, both garage door openers died, both garage door springs busted, the entire sprinkler system needed to be redone, just to name a few things. The latest was the AC dying this summer. The deck, driveway, and windows all need to be replaced as well but I have no idea how I’m going to come up with the money for any of that anytime soon.
I swear this house must be cursed. There’s a reason the previous owners only lived here 2 years.
Edit: How could I forget about the bats in the attic and the mice getting into the basement constantly? It took almost 9 years to finally get that all sorted out.
Edit 2: My car and my wife’s car are both 15+ years old and having considerable issues but because of all the money we’ve had to sink into the house we’re not sure how we’ll be able to afford even just 1 “new” used car anytime soon.
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99 sats \ 1 reply \ @k00b OP 18 Aug
That sounds like torture. Being unhappy at home is the worst. I'm sure you've considered everything and are making the best decision you possibly can.
One thing I like to do when I'm unhappy where finances are relevant is to put a dollar amount on what I'd pay to be rid of the unhappiness. My experience pales in comparison to yours, but when we were unhappy at our last home I priced how much I'd pay to be rid of the unhappiness, and while we ended up paying 50% more in rent to move and are even more house poor, it was worth it. I'm glad it was an option for us because it was driving me absolutely bonkers.
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Thank you. That is actually really good advice. I’m going to have to think about that and see if that can help my situation.
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No wonder you don’t get enough sleep! Hugs
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Yeah, thanks.
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this house is cursed. it's sucking up your generative energy. get out... or bless it, idk. sincerely, your stacker.news shaman.
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The closing date on the sale of my house was October 31 so maybe that should have been a sign.
My wife and I did get a generic house blessing after we were married but maybe we need something stronger…
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There are plenty of decisions I've made that were probably ill-advised, but I can't regret anything from before my daughter was born. I'm pretty confident that if literally anything had happened differently prior to her conception, then she wouldn't exist. That's just based on the vast improbabilities of DNA combination.
Focusing on the past few years, though, I would have made a different home purchase decision. We increasingly feel like we bought a Bluth and that there were better locations available.
It's not a huge deal, but it's also not an easily reversed decision.
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1114 sats \ 4 replies \ @grayruby 18 Aug
I would have quit drinking sooner.
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hang in there friend. we are all in this together-
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Thanks. Been almost a decade since I had a drink but would prefer it was even longer than that.
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50 sats \ 1 reply \ @k00b OP 18 Aug
That's a good one. It's such a high time preference thing.
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Yes, it is one of the worst things you can do for your physical, mental health and relationships. I am not against people who like to enjoy a drink or two but significant alcohol consumption is an awful habit. In September it will be 10 years since I had a drink. I just decided to quit one day and never drink again. Was tired of all the time and money I wasted going out drinking 4 or 5 times a week and the negative impact it had in my life.
After I quit my marriage got better. My business got better. My health got better.
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302 sats \ 0 replies \ @ChrisS 18 Aug
Not figuring out that marriage is hard and takes a lot of time and effort everyday to make it work. But if you put in the time and effort to make it work in the right way with the right foundation it’s the best investment you can make.
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195 sats \ 0 replies \ @nichro 18 Aug
I like to think there's very few true regrets because most things are regretted because they haven't been dealt with and the lessons therein not yet extracted.
Like most, I've had my share of regrets, but once you've taken the time to understand them, learn from them, realise the importance they had in your growth in hindsight, even if they were painful detours or obstacles... then they cease to be regrets. It's hard to call them that after that.
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I would have started a family way earlier.
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When did you first become a dad? If it helps, I was in my late late 30s
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I would not marry and would only have one child. Marriage gives negligible benefits and is stacked against the man. And regarding one child: life is cheaper and gets easier much much sooner than with multiple children.
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I agree with you. I have two kids n am sighing heavily every day. I tell myself that my second child is the best present I can give my first born though. I think it’s not easy to go through life as an only child - especially when both parents get gravely sick
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100 sats \ 0 replies \ @aljaz 19 Aug
getting rid of live fast die young lifestyle earlier
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The classic... Ignoring Bitcoin for several years. At first I saw it as an interesting experiment that would likely lead nowhere. It took me a while to understand the solid ground that was being paved at that time.
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Buying bitcoin at $1k because it was too expensive...lol
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I told it earlier that I wanted toearn coding but due to someone suggesting me foe something else. I did not learn it. I think I still have time to change it. I'm learning coding now.
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Well have you considered that everything happens in its own time n even if you had signed up for the programming course 5 years earlier, you might not have derived so much value from it because you weren’t ready yet?
During my mum’s dying days, I had made an arrangement to have dinner with some close friends. So I left her at the hospital to fulfill that commitment. In hindsight, I wish I had prioritised my mum instead because that was the last chance that was gifted to me to have a proper real long conversation with her.
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There is nothing I would do differently. I can look back and see that I made some foolish choices at times. Maybe even what people would consider mistakes. But they all got me to here. And this is my favorite place to be. Many lessons learned.
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I have many but to select one i would say I would change my decision of falling into the habit of smoking for 5 years. Now I've left it completely and feel so relieved.
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🤔Great question, you know! I'm the kind of person who firmly believes that "everything that happens, happens for a reason, whatever it may be!!" and that's fine. Maybe I could mention a couple of facts from my teenage years, or maybe one or the other a few years ago when I was at university. But in the end I think it's not worth it, since in the end every decision we've made, good or bad, is the cause of the person we are today and we must assume that that's fine, now, if on the other hand you feel that your being is missing something, you have to look for it, we can still do it! You're alive and breathing!! And now we're freer than ever with BITCOIN. ⚡🍊 So go and get it. It doesn't matter how long it takes you, in the end we live for that, to constantly seek our goals. 🏁
THANKS for your post and making me reflect on this idea.
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Keep an open mind to other people's ideas and views, and always stay humble. Remember, there is no champion forever."
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“If I could change anything about my past, I would focus on choosing better friends and developing a more serious mindset about my future. I never realized how stressful adulthood would be.
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Well, the answer I'm going to give suddenly sounds very obvious... but the truth is that if I could change something I would buy bitcoin without a doubt! Since I discovered or since I am learning to work with bitcoin, my mind has completely changed and I am no longer asleep and honestly, if bitcoin were purchased in the past, many of my current problems would not be there or would be minimal... It has changed my life. .
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That's something we all regret I think. Maybe except Satoshi and Trammel. But if Satoshi abandoned his coins for opsec/privacy reasons, maybe he regrets not buying in enough later.
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I have always thought that the decisions we have made at some point in our lives have always been made with some determination or something that has led us to make them, regretting them would be a process that we would have to discover as we move forward.
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stackers have outlawed this. turn on wild west mode in your /settings to see outlawed content.