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In order to embrace the non-linear approach, I believe you got to be more self-aware than the average person, since you are deliberately taking the path less travelled.
This seems right. I wonder if this is why some of the most successful people (by my standard, and perhaps, based on what you've written, by yours) are also some of the most self-aware? Because the purpose that emerges will be a function of how well one knows oneself, so that they may follow that non-linear path?
To me, teaching students of different ages at different institutions was worth the trade off I made in terms of fortune n status. No regrets.
Getting an outcome that you've consciously chosen makes these kinds of bitter pills go down more easily. Far more than just the magnitude of the difference, not choosing anything, and not trying for anything, seems to leave people extra bitter and susceptible to the cancerous envy that comes with observing other people's success.
I faced a lot of existential angst in my 20s haha
Let's hope it's the necessary fertilizer for better things later.
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