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Step 1: login to their npub
Step 2: mark down their relays
Step 3: log out of their npub
Step 4: login with your keys
Step 5: compare and add relays

how do you mean login to their npub?

reply

You can login with any npub for read only access on some clients like Snort:

https://m.stacker.news/16585

That's also how you can see who writes who on nostr and read their notifications.

For example, here I am logged in as Jack:

https://m.stacker.news/16586

update: apparently, Snort does not show you the messages anymore but it's still possible per protocol