Hi @cryotosensei

Regarding 1: That seems a bit strong. I think "Don’t invite friends home without informing her" would be better than having to ask for permission. The home belongs to both of you. It is important to maintain friendships as much as possible in a relationship. And you certainly do not need her permission for that. And inviting friends over should be a natural thing. It might help to give an advanced warning so she can plan accordingly if need be, something like "I'd like to have my friend XYZ come over Thursday evening."

Regarding 2: I think it is also important to share. To share especially with your kids. You are sharing the food, why not also share occasionally the rice bowl? It might be seen as forming a tie, if both parent and kids like to do that. I see little harm if it is voluntary on both parts. Each one has his "holy" item. To some it is his/her car, that nobody is allowed to touch, etc. I believe the more we can share in the family and friend circle the better. The smaller the circle the more we should share. In the circle of 2, you and your partner, you should share a vast amount of things. In the circle of 4, you, your partner and your 2 kids, you should share many things. The bigger the circle the less we share usually.

Regarding 3 and 4: seems reasonable to me.

All of that just my humble opinion, nothing more.