My framework for relay sustainability is something like ngrok, a web gateway for self-hosted (decentralized) applications, like Lightning nodes. 

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Frightening Network

nicosey

> There's no such thing as free infrastructure is true of nostr or otherwise

Agreed

> a nostr native solution is a 10x cost and friction reduction

I disagree, though I suspect the potential is there to *make* a 10x cost reduction on nostr

> a few sats to a relay vs. several dollars for a web-server or custodian

yes, this is promising...but I don't think we are there yet due to market immaturity in nostr. E.g. it seems to me that relays often take the money and run, whereas web servers do that less often. The market seems to be on a path toward maturity though and I am hopeful

> More problematically, the network friction is causing untold numbers to not use Lightning at all

Yes and this is true for nostr too

For now