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You make strong arguments and I relate to them personally. For instance, my first grader is developing a passion for dinosaurs — a topic that is not covered in our national curriculum. If I were to be shortsighted and deny him the pleasure of going down this rabbit hole, he wouldn’t have the chance to develop a sense of intrinsic motivation
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I think bullying us rare outside of school. Kids bully because they're bored and want to find something more exciting.
I think if you can, try to let the kids handle problems amongst themselves. I jump in when it gets violent but try to stay out of it when it's just arguing.
Home schooling isn't about locking your kids away from the outside world. For me its more about following your interests, learning at your own speed and having fun.
As long as there are other mixed aged home schoolers that the kids can play with a lot of the stigma about socialization goes away.