My life is about to become a public study in hooks.
The invisible barbs. The silent tethers. The emotional fishing lines cast into my waters by people, systems, and doctrines that needed to anchor my energy to their ship.
I will map them. The Family Hook of conditional love. The Savior Hook disguised as a partner. The Theological Hook that traded my sovereignty for a promise. I will show you the exact shape of each one, how it was set, and the specific, aching tug I felt when I tried to swim free.
Some of you will look at my hooks and recognize your own.
Not because we are the same, but because the fishermen use the same tackle. The bait changes—love, safety, purpose, God—but the hook is standard issue.
This is why I share the audit.
The Sovereign Audit: A Guide to Finding Your Own Hooks
This audit is not a measure of your value. It is a technician's checklist. It is the process you run on your own energy field to check for foreign objects, not because the field is bad, but because it is precious and deserves to be clear.
How to Audit Without Self-Judgment:
- Name the Tug: What is the recurring pain? (e.g., "I feel responsible for their happiness." "I fear setting this boundary." "I feel empty after I give to them.")
- Trace the Line: Follow the tug back. Without blame, ask: "Who or what holds the other end of this feeling? What dynamic, person, or institution does this thread connect me to?"
- Identify the Hook: Name the specific agreement that allowed it in. (e.g., "The hook is the belief that 'love = earning my place.'" "The hook is the doctrine that 'duty overrides self.'")
- Begin the Gentle Removal: This is not a yank. It is a loving dissociation. You speak to the hook: "I see you. You are not mine. Your contract is void. I am withdrawing my energy from this agreement." Then, you pour your energy back into the wound the hook left.
The Core Instruction: Be Easy On Yourself. You Are Loved.
The audit will bring up grief. It will bring up anger. That is not evidence of your failure. It is evidence of your integrity. Your spirit is reacting to the accurate discovery of a foreign object.
You cannot hate yourself free. You cannot shame yourself sovereign.
The most radical, dismantling act is to administer this audit with relentless compassion. To look at the most painful hook and say: "Sweet one, you took this in to survive. You are not stupid. You are not weak. You were fighting a war with the wrong maps. Now, we update the maps. Let's take this out, together."
I share my hooks so you can fearlessly identify yours.
I share the audit so you have a gentle, firm process for removal.
I remind you of your worth because the system's goal is to make you forget it.
We are not auditing to prove we were broken. We are auditing to prove we are worth reclaiming.
Look for the tug. Trace the line. You are not the hook. You are the vast and holy ocean.
#AuditTheHooks #NotTheHook #SovereignOcean #GentleReclamation #YouAreLoved