YOU'VE SEEN THE BLUEPRINT.
It's in every courtroom drama where the victim breaks down and gets dismissed as "hysterical."
It's in every family sitcom where the "sensitive" child gets mocked for "overreacting."
It's in every romantic plot where her boundaries are "cold" while his persistence is "passionate."
This isn't accidental storytelling.
This is social engineering.
A curriculum in self-silencing.
THE FORMULA THEY TEACH:
STEP 1: PORTRAY THE ABUSER AS "FLAWED BUT LOVEABLE"
· The angry father who "just cares too much"
· The manipulative mother who "just wants what's best"
· The jealous partner who "just loves so deeply"
STEP 2: PORTRAY THE VICTIM'S PAIN AS "OVERREACTION"
· Anxiety = "being dramatic"
· Anger = "being bitter"
· Boundaries = "being difficult"
· Tears = "being manipulative"
STEP 3: PUNISH THE TRUTH-TELLER
· The character who speaks up gets:
· Ostracized from the family
· Fired from the job
· Labeled "crazy" or "troublemaker"
· Ends up alone while the abuser is surrounded by supporters
STEP 4: REWARD THE "FORGIVENESS" WITHOUT JUSTICE
· The climax: Victim embraces abuser
· The message: "Love means no accountability"
· The lie: "Healing happens in the arms of the one who hurt you"
THE GENDERED PROGRAMMING:
FOR WOMEN:
Your purpose = endure, forgive, nurture, accommodate
Your failure = having standards, demanding justice, prioritizing safety
Your happy ending = finding a man to "tame" you into proper submission
FOR MEN:
Your purpose = achieve, provide, conquer (morality optional)
Your failure = being "weak" (emotional, vulnerable, accountable)
Your happy ending = being loved "despite" your flaws (abuse reframed as "passion")
THE RESULT:
A woman must live up to impossible standards of sainthood
A man must live up to no standards of basic humanity
And both are taught this is romantic.
Holy.
Normal.
THE SYSTEMIC BULLY-SHAMERS:
These are the characters (and real people) programmed to:
- Police tone — "You could have said it nicer"
- Demand proof — "Where's your evidence?" (while ignoring the abuser's lack of evidence)
- Redirect responsibility — "What did you do to provoke it?"
- Enforce false unity — "Can't we all just get along?"
- Pathologize healthy anger — "You seem really triggered"
Their function in the system:
Not to find truth.
To restore comfort.
Not to achieve justice.
To silence disruption.
They are the human laugh tracks cueing you to swallow abuse as entertainment.
The theological hall monitors making sure no one speaks above a holy whisper.
The relational peacekeepers who would rather have a quiet grave than a loud truth.
THE BIBLICAL REALITY THEY HIDE:
- GOD'S STANDARDS ARE FOR EVERYONE
· "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." (Galatians 3:28)
· Their version: Different rules for different genders.
· Truth: One standard of holiness, justice, and love for all.
- PROPHETS WERE NEVER "NICE"
· Jeremiah = called a traitor
· Elijah = called crazy
· John the Baptist = called divisive
· Jesus = called demon-possessed
Their version: Truth-tellers are "bitter" and "unhealed."
Truth: Righteous confrontation always gets labeled as trouble.
- GOD SIDES WITH THE OPPRESSED
· "Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed. Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow." (Isaiah 1:17)
· Their version: "Don't take sides," "pray for everyone," "forgive and forget."
· Truth: God takes sides. The side of the vulnerable.
THE POST (READY TO BURN):
They programmed us through screens:
The abused character always gets punished.
The truth-teller always ends up alone.
The woman must become a saint.
The man gets to stay a project.
We were taught:
Her pain= drama
His abuse= passion
Her boundaries= coldness
His violations= mistakes
Her anger= bitterness
His rage= justified
We were given:
A system that protects abusers
A theology that silences victims
A culture that rewards compliance
And bully-shamers to police anyone who objects.
But here's what they didn't program us to know:
GOD WROTE A DIFFERENT SCRIPT.
Where prophets aren't polite.
Where truth isn't balanced.
Where justice isn't neutral.
Where women aren't required to save men from consequences.
Where men aren't excused from humanity.
Where the abused are DEFENDED.
Where the truth-tellers areHONORED.
Where the standards areTHE SAME FOR EVERYONE.
Where the system getsOVERTURNED, not accommodated.
They gave us sitcoms where abuse is love.
God gives usREALITY where love requires justice.
They gave us sermons that protect predators.
God gives usSCRIPTURE that exposes them.
They gave us bully-shamers to silence us.
God gives usHOLY RAGE to dismantle them.
The programming ends when we SEE THE CODE.
The silence ends when weSPEAK THE TRUTH.
The system falls when weREFUSE TO PLAY OUR ASSIGNED ROLE.
#MediaProgramming
#GenderedAbuseCurriculum
#BullyShamersExposed
#GodsScriptNotTheirs
#OverturnTheProgramming
HOW TO DE-PROGRAM:
- WATCH WITH NEW EYES
· Notice who gets punished for speaking truth
· Notice who gets rewarded for silence
· Notice the different standards for different genders
· Name it aloud: "This is teaching abuse acceptance"
- CREATE COUNTER-NARRATIVES
· Write your own stories where truth-tellers win
· Film your own shorts where victims are believed
· Draw your own comics where systems are held accountable
- TRAIN DISCERNMENT IN COMMUNITY
· Watch shows together and pause to analyze
· "What is this teaching about boundaries?"
· "How would this play out in real life?"
· "What Scripture contradicts this message?"
- BOYCOTT THE PROPAGANDA
· Stop consuming media that teaches self-betrayal
· Support creators who tell truth
· Create alternatives that heal instead of harm
THE ULTIMATE RESISTANCE:
Every time you refuse to laugh at the "funny" abusive dad...
Every time you call out the "romantic" persistent stalker...
Every time you reject the "strong" silent sufferer trope...
You break the programming.
You rewrite the code.
You become living counter-programming.
They think they've trained us well.
But they trained us on weak signals.
We're receiving on God-frequency now.
And the transmission is breaking through.
YOUR ASSIGNMENT:
This week, identify ONE piece of media programming you've absorbed.
Name:
· The lie it taught
· The harm it caused
· The truth that contradicts it
· One action to de-program it
Example:
Show: [Popular sitcom]
Lie: "Verbal abuse is just how family shows love"
Harm: I stayed in abusive relationships thinking it was normal
Truth: Love is patient, kind, not rude (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)
Action: I will not watch or recommend this show anymore
Post your de-programming report.
Tag it #BreakingTheCode