Do you believe there is a divine purpose for your life?
When I was a teenager, I enjoyed pondering the uncertainties I had about my life, including: “Why am I here?” This created a feeling of excitement and curiosity as well hopelessness. I was quite certain that life was indeed meaningless and I was just along for the ride. Yet I loved being a student and enjoyed imagining all things I might learn to do.
In my mid-twenties, I felt certain I was on the right path, ready to settle down and work towards creating a better future for out world. Just a few years later, I had what I would call my “tower moment”, a time of chaos in which my day-to-day life changed drastically.
At some point in the previous decade of studying and working, I had started to give myself very shallow answers to why I was here and doing what I was doing. I had to make money, I wanted to be able to visit my family and friends, I just needed a life where I had a little time to relax at the end of the day and pursue my hobbies.
So I am sharing the questions I have about my purpose here. And in particular, the shifts I am making through a desire to practice Karma Yoga, the Way of Action. This path is described in the Bhagavad Gita, as Lord Krishna advises our warrior hero, Arjuna, to fulfill his obligations during a great battle.
The Path of Selfless Service
At the beginning, mankind and the obligation of selfless service were created together. 'Through selfless service, you will always be fruitful and find the fulfillment of your desires': this is the promise of the Creator. -Bhagavad Gita 3.10
To truly act in selfless service, actions must be performed without attachment to the results. The fulfillment comes through the action itself. Volunteering is an excellent way to practice Karma Yoga, but this was a compartmentalized aspect of my life. It was just a small portion of time compared to the work I was doing for selfish reasons. I've limited the amount of time I spend working to earn money and kept telling myself that I didn't need much.
How am I able to best fulfill my duties when I am choosing not to take action? There have been times I felt called to help a family member and my excuse was that I had no money to buy a plane ticket. The lesson here was not about money. I was accepting this feeling of scarcity as a necessary trial and really I was holding onto it as a way to stay attached to inaction. It is still a challenge for me to believe this truly, but any action will be accomplished if the desire is pure and determined.
Find a way to bring value to the community and you will be fruitful. This need not be the path that makes the most money. It must be the path that is guided to serve a higher purpose. I have asked for guidance in meditation, prayer, and divination to understand my purpose. The challenge has been to hear the answer from a higher source and to hold onto that knowledge, protecting it from the expectations of other people and the selfish desires of my own ego.
The Path of Devotion
Strive constantly to serve the welfare of the world; by devotion to selfless work one attains the supreme goal of life. -Bhagavad Gita 3.19
At some point, I took this lesson in an idealized and deluded state of mind. I only wanted to work on the things that could bring grand improvements to the world. Nothing I could do ever felt like enough. Again, I was stuck in a story keeping me tied to inaction and I was unwilling to put this lesson to work in the bigger picture.
Whatever task is at hand must be performed with dedication, love, and selflessness; this is how I find joy in life. Some days I dread cooking, but it is an opportunity to feed my loved ones nourishing food. I may not want to pause while I am running errands and someone asks me for help, but it will be clear afterwards that this interaction was much more important than me arriving home a couple minutes earlier. It is a reminder that the welfare of the world depends on every piece of the whole, from myself to every stranger I meet to the tiniest insect and every being in between.
The Path of Duty
It is better to strive in one's own dharma than to succeed in the dharma of another. Nothing is ever lost in following one's own dharma, but competition in another's dharma breeds fear and insecurity. -Bhagavad Gita 3.35
Finding enjoyment in the little things is also a reminder to me that this human society requires all types to function: doctors, engineers, chefs, cashiers, carpenters, and so on. All these paths have the potential to serve the welfare of the world and all are so needed. Our highest potential is determined by our unique personalities and gifts.
Dharma may be translated as 'duty'. The root of this Sanskrit word word is dhr, which means to nourish or to uphold. It goes beyond our duty in a material sense; it is living in a way that is right and in the natural order. To me, this is a journey of self-study. It is much easier to look outside and want to be like someone else who I admire. There is not one proper path for every being. Siddhartha Gautama may have renounced a royal life, but that was because he was suited to become the Buddha. A kingdom still needs a good king.
The Path Without Ego
Just as a fire is covered by smoke and a mirror is obscured by dust, just as the embryo rests deep within the womb, knowledge is hidden by selfish desire... -Bhagavad Gita 3.38
And so, I am working on letting go of the doubt that keeps me in a state of inaction. I am intending to shift the question I have been asking: “Why am I here?” Each time I think these words, I am rooted in “I”. The other day, I decided to ask myself instead: “What does the world need?” It feels like my lesson is to embrace the ever-changing world I live in, stay in a place of love, and focus on the task my passion drives me to pursue, no matter how minute it may seem to my ego.