I Will F**king Haymaker You If You Mention Agile Again

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I Will F**king Haymaker You If You Mention Agile Again — Ludicity ludic.mataroa.blog/blog/i-will-fucking-haymaker-you-if-you-mention-agile-again/

849 sats \ 20 comments \ @kepford 3 Jul devs

I Personally Find Stand-Ups Very Usefu-

Stop.

Those apologists who insist that Agile works very well for them - you can leave now with my blessing. Half of you have only worked at functional organizations, and you're best off not knowing how most of the world lives. Your precious, pure minds are possibly the tech world's rarest resource, and they must be protected at all costs.

The other half of you are absolutely deluded. All of you, you stay. Greg, lock the doors.

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127 sats \ 0 replies \ @JesseJames 3 Jul

Priceless blog post. Now Nik , take a deep breath, relax and tel us how you really feel about Agile. But this time, don't hold back....lol

74 sats \ 1 reply \ @profullstack 3 Jul

i've been saying agile sucks since 2008 when i was first introduced to it.

55 sats \ 0 replies \ @Bell_curve 3 Jul

A good project manager will adapt to each team member to optimize performance

Everyone has a different way of working

I am not a morning person so morning meetings are productivity killers

74 sats \ 1 reply \ @ek 3 Jul freebie

Maybe async standups are not what people think when they hear "agile" but that's my experience with agile: you're agile and thus can shape "agile" into whatever works best for your team. That was most of the times simply sharing what you're planning to do and if there is anything blocking you in a slack channel. I think it worked great. We were all very conscious of our time spent in meetings.

If communication within your team sucks regarding this, then agile (or any form of organization) is going to suck, yes. I don't think that's a problem with agile (or any form of organization), that's a problem with your team (manager).

74 sats \ 0 replies \ @ek 3 Jul freebie

You see, the problem is actually totally unrelated to Agile. The problem is really that most of these people are not good at their jobs. The part of the human mind that is supposed to recognize patterns and make plans has been utterly calcified somehow, and is only capable of repeating the same moves over and over. They would fail to manage with any methodology, and the thing I object to is that they've chosen to fail in a way that inconveniences other people.

Mhh, maybe the author and me don't have that different views.

73 sats \ 0 replies \ @jurraca 3 Jul

lol, I am living the exact clown car described here.

72 sats \ 5 replies \ @0fje0 3 Jul

This guy sure knows how to rant. I've read most of his rants. Some are better than others, but there's almost always something to learn from it.

Except, of course, when he rants about bitcoin. /s

38 sats \ 4 replies \ @kepford OP 3 Jul

I haven't seen that one lol

55 sats \ 3 replies \ @0fje0 3 Jul

If I remember correctly, it wasn't the topic of the rant. It just came up while lambasting something else in his typical style.

38 sats \ 2 replies \ @kepford OP 3 Jul

I know many smart opinionated people that pass or hate on bitcoin. They lack the curiosity to challenge conventional thinking. I get a sense this guy and others like him are reacting to the very loud and frankly dumb NGU crypto crowd. Or they are reacting to the hype cycle that exists in tech. After all, the blockchain everything has a lot of the same markers as the current AI craze.

Most of the world lumps bitcoin in with crypto. Most of the coverage of bitcoin isn't accurate. All this to say, I don't pass on someone because they don't get bitcoin or even hate on it. It does inform me about them though.

I've talked to a few smart people in the tech space about bitcoin when they make some of hand remark. I usually find they are just ignorant and everyone they have encountered that is "a bitcoiner" is an idiot.

55 sats \ 1 reply \ @0fje0 3 Jul

All this to say, I don't pass on someone because they don't get bitcoin or even hate on it. It does inform me about them though.

Exactly. Well said.

0 sats \ 0 replies \ @kepford OP 3 Jul

And we all have blind spots. I have changed my opinion on many subjects over the years. I'm sure I am wrong about something now and I'm hopeful it will be resolved.

55 sats \ 0 replies \ @Bell_curve 3 Jul

There is one word that prevents people from maximizing their potential and that word is…

Meetings

17 sats \ 0 replies \ @kepford OP 3 Jul

I don't hate agility but the whole Agile movement has lost the plot. They have lost the whole reason for its existence. It took some time but I've come around to the position that Agile should just be dumped. Don't do Agile, be agile. There are things in Agile that make sense and good teams do what works for them and leave the rest but you sometimes meet someone that has drank the koolaid and is a zealot for following it like some sort of religious text.

The solution is for teammates to be honest about what works and what doesn't. If you are ignored you have bigger problems than "Agile".

74 sats \ 5 replies \ @orthwyrm 3 Jul

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50 sats \ 4 replies \ @Bell_curve 3 Jul

The daily morning check in is overkill

Monday Wednesday Friday 3 morning meetings per week or sprint

Whatever

Do you use atlassian or jira lol

19 sats \ 3 replies \ @orthwyrm 3 Jul

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50 sats \ 2 replies \ @Bell_curve 3 Jul

We survived without it lol

19 sats \ 1 reply \ @orthwyrm 3 Jul

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50 sats \ 0 replies \ @Bell_curve 3 Jul

Exactly

It’s about the user not the software